Forgive vs. Forget vs. Memories

"Your actions may be forgiven but the past is something that can never be forgotten."
The old phrase 'forgive and forget' is something that has always perplexed me intelectually. It just has never made sense to me. The Dixie Chicks said it right in their song "Not Ready To Make Nice", "Forgive, sounds good; forget, I'm not sure I could." Actions that have harmful consequences are like memories in our brains, they are something that can never be erased. You may be able to forgive someone for stealing your money, however, you will never forget that action and therefore, never trust that person with money again. Memories are just something that will get stored in the back of your mind until another situation triggers that thought to return again to the forefront. You may forgive the drunk driver that paralyzed your child but everytime you see them you remember again the situation, it is never fully forgotten.

"Memories"
When most poeple think of memories they think of happy times they've had. Nobody's first thought when the word memory is said is a sad, tragic moment in their life. So, why can't a memory be something sad and tragic why does it have to be a happy time? In my opinion, a memory is a remembrance of a past event, it doesn't specify whether the event is good, sad, happy, mad, etc - it is simply just an event. Think of a memorial: it is put up to remember the happy times a person/group had, not the tragic death they faced. When you attend a funeral and you recieve a paper that says, "In memoriam:" with the person's name listed after, it is meant to signify that you will be remembering the happy times that person had in their life. As humans we tend to subconscienally block out the bad, even when maybe we shouldn't.